Boys, Bats, and Bruised Egos

I've mentioned previously that the Boy is allowed to go downstairs from time-to-time. Every few minutes, I'll yell downstairs "What are you doing?" and he'll respond "I'm watching cartoons" or "I'm eating cereal" or "playing!". Yesterday he responded, in a non-smart-alec way, "Don't worry about it!". Well, there are two aspects of him that I hold against him: 1) he's male and 2) he's under 12. From my experience with "don't worry about it"'s, if it's a guy, it's normally said in a snotty, sarcastic way and you'd better damn well worry about it because he's downstairs watching football, drinking a beer, while pretending to do laundry and clean the kitchen as suggested. So start getting mad immediately. I've also noted that if it's said in a person under 12, this means they're getting into something they're not supposed to. Of course, upon hearing that response yesterday, I barged downstairs pronto expecting him to have a handful of flour in one hand and a jar of honey in the other. But guess what: my theory proved wrong! He was sitting in the recliner, actually watching tv, and I needn't have worried about it.

....which leads me to today when I did need to worry about it...

The Boy has a bat. Why God created bats for children under 12 is beyond me. And why I continue to let bats exist in this household is another discussion to which there is no good answer. So anyway, there is a bat, the Boy hits with it (because what else do you do with a bat?), and today he was hitting Daddy. And Daddy was encouraging it. They're both laughing it up, having a jolly good time. You may see where this is headed. Yes, Boy hits Daddy too hard and Daddy gets mad. Well, this makes me want to hit Daddy with the bat because how can he get mad at him for the exact act which he was just encouraging? Another unanswerable question.